Day 186: Identity

Listening: Don’t you wanna swim with me? Don’t you wanna feel my skin on your skin? It's only natural.

What's my problem? Figuring out the next move.

I was lured into the world of food and cooking through new American, French based cooking. I was. I was enamored with seared foie gras, deep rich sauces, and pan seared fish. I was lured in by the perfect individual plates with their schmears, swooshes, drizzles and garnishes. I was birthed into this industry making vinaigrettes and aiolis. I live in rendering individual duck breasts and pan searing/roasting fish. I reduce down my stocks. I use wine. And butter. Lots of butter.

I was taught cooking in a western style using western ingredients. It largely defines who I currently am as a cook. The restaurants that I have cooked at are all western restaurants, whether it's the American regional cuisine I'm doing now or the French/Cuban fusion food that I started off doing at the beginning of my career.

The fuct up thing is that when I put up specials, or add my input on specials, it is, without a doubt, with an Asian flair. I have made Peking duck, ginger and lotus broths, crispy fried sushi rice cakes, quick kimchee, and dumplings upon dumplings upon dumplings.

A lot of these are flavors that I grew up with. Aside from cucumbers and asparagus being a couple of my top favorite vegetables, I would also throw in gai lan, or Chinese broccoli, water chestnuts, bean sprouts, and morning glory.

I love soy sauce and chili pastes. I love noodles and dumplings. Do I cook with them much at work? Not so much. Usually only for staff meal or the occasional special.

I'm finding that more and more every day, my soul as an Asian-American cook supersedes my soul as a western cook. I'm not saying that I want to put down my saucepans and my demiglace and trade them in for woks and claypots. I just feel the need to use the flavors that I grew up with and the ones that I hold closer to my heart. I feel the need to learn to produce and use that which I am so familiar with.

Lately, I find myself being enamored with cookbooks focusing on Asian cuisine. I bypass the TK's AdHoc cookbook and barely give a second glance to Joel Robuchon's books (though they are very nice books). Instead, I spent a half hour looking at a book that strictly dealt with Asian dumplings, how to make the wrappers from scratch, how to fold them, and what to fill them with. It was entrancing. I looked at the Momofuku cookbook and was drawn in by the ingredients, the methods and the dishes.

So, as I ave been thinking about my career, I think that maybe I should try to go work at an Asian based restaurant. I don't mean that I want to go work in Chinatown, though that would be really cool. I feel like I need to work at a place that will help me become a better fine dining cook while allowing me to use some of my Asian tastes.

I would love to go work for David Chang at Momofuku in New York City, but I'm sure that guy has a million people banging on his door. Ken Oringer does Asian fusion food at his sushi bar, but I think that's far too close to white tablecloths for me. Ming Tsai... well.... He's out in the 'burbs, and I'm not particularly fond of his food.

I did, however find a job posting on Bostonchefs.com for a new place opening up in Inman Square. It describes itself as a Chinese style noodle house that will be creating Chinese inspired dishes using locally grown ingredients. They'll be using whole animals, which is a plus in my book as well. The chef, apparently, worked at Lumiere, T.W. Food and Hungry Mother, which is a big selling point for me as well.

I'm planning on dropping off my resume this Monday when I'm back home for break. We'll see how this all plays out. But for now, I think it might be a good move for me. Maybe it's time I got in touch with my roots in a professional setting.