Day 46: Ding Dong, The Witch Is Dead!

Listening: Broken down kitchen at the top of the stairs. Can I mix in with your affairs? Share a smoke. Make a joke. Grasp and reach for a leg of hope.

What's my problem? I'm not even supposed to BE here.

Originally, I was going to title the post "Hygiene." I would have talked about how I got my knife so sharp that I could shave the hair off of the back of my arm with it. I would have told you that I have the sharpest knife in the kitchen. I would have also told you a bit about how the graceless rhinoceros, the other day, went into her room, dropped her towel in front of her roommate and proceeded to insert a tampon in front of her as well as apply some Vagisil. I would have told you all about the disgust and the reaction of Brittany, the roommate who was exposed to such an attrocity. I would have told you all of that, but I won't.

Instead, this post is titled "Ding Dong, The Witch Is Dead." Can you guess what happened? No? Well, I'll tell you.

Yesterday, the graceless rhinoceros gets a call from her boyfriend. He's been fired from his job for being a douchebag. So they decide that they're leaving. She gives Chef ten minutes notice. That's right. Ten minutes. Not two weeks. Not two days. Ten minutes. Before we know it, she's packed up and headed to the boat.

Everyone was pretty pleased that she would be leaving, but it wasn't without repercussions. Papi had to work that night. He was supposed to have the day off, and intended on going surfing because the waves were supposed to be fantastic that day. Instead, he was banging out two hundred and four dinners.

For me, I was supposed to have today off. Linh was supposed to fly down and hang out with me for the day. Instead, I had to call her off and work tonight. To be honest, it would have been nice to see a friendly face around here that knows me, but I think that in the long run, it's better that the rhinoceros is gone.

Right now I'm pretty tired. I have been working a lot, but I guess that's what I signed up for. It's a good thing that I'm putting away three quarters of my paycheck. Anyhow that's all the news that's fit to be printed at the moment. Hopefully I'll have more eventful things to tell you once I get some rest. The Fourth felt just like any other day. Hopefully, my next day off will be fun and relaxing like today was supposed to be.